Chapter 10. Nurturing self

Dr. Yeshwanth K. Amdekar, DCH, MD (Pediatrics), FIAP

It’s not selfish to love yourself, to take care of yourself and

make happiness as a priority. It’s necessary Mandy Hale

If your compassion does not include yourself, it is

Incomplete Jack Cornfield

Introduction

Nurturing is an act of encouraging, nourishing and caring for someone or something to promote ideal functioning. Nurturing self refers to continued care necessary to maintain good health that is totally in our own hands and for which we are solely responsible. Most of us are lucky to be born with good health but as we move along with our life, we often fail to maintain good health due to sheer neglect. Ironically this is more likely with doctors who look after health of others but are deficient in looking after their own health for various inexcusable reasons. Thus, they often miss out on good health. Good health is not a divine gift but needs ideal selfnurture, possible in older children and adults. Younger children require parents to nurture them and set the health in right direction, while older children may need supervision.

What is health?

Health is complete state of physical, mental and spiritual well-being and not just absence of disease or infirmity. However, individuals vary in their potential to achieve total health and so one must understand that this definition relates to expected performance commensurate with age and prevalent cultural norms in the society.

Physical health

It is measured by common parameters such as weight, height and BMI body mass index and should be within normal standard limits appropriate for age, ethnicity and family pattern. It is best assessed by functional competence in terms of energy to perform physical activities.

Child during growing periods must maintain centiles on growth chart and an adult must maintain weight within small variations throughout life.

There are five important inputs necessary to maintain good physical health and they include balanced diet (plenty of vegetables and fruits with control on sugar and salt intake), ideal physical exercise (appropriately strenuous for an hour a day), adequate sleep (7-8 hours a day), proper hygiene (skin, teeth, genitalia) and time for leisure and hobbies that rejuvenate for better performance.

Mental health

It consists of emotional (empathy, coping up with stress, tolerant and remaining happy), philosophical (self-regulation, contented, satisfied, work with passion beyond rewards) and social health (socially accepted behavior, build stronger relationship and bonding). Mental health is nurtured during childhood by parents and other family members, further guided by role model teachers and thereafter fine-tuned and sustained with internal motivation by an adult.

Spiritual health

It has nothing to do with religion but consists of spreading love, avoiding jealousy and hatred, altruism, harmony, concerns about others and trying to help the needy. It is also nurtured in a similar way as mental health

Happiness a part of good health

Happiness is not included in the definition of health but I feel it is the measure of maximum health. Happiness is a state of mind and complete health can be nurtured only with harmonious relationship of body with mind. Mens sana in corpore sano meaning healthy mind in a healthy body -is an emblem of Grant Medical College in Mumbai my alma mater – third oldest medical college in India started in 1845 and this emblem is so apt to sensitise medical students starting their career. Meaningful life is be useful, helpful, compassionate and be blessed and daily acts of such kindness add up to happiness. Happiness is a spectrum of satisfaction, contentment, joy and bliss that results when you appreciate what you have. Happiness is different from pleasure that is transient and felt only by a single organ but happiness pervades through entire body and gives you long lasting experience. It is also different than success that is based on reward, recognition, position or power and is what is perceived by others. Both pleasure and success do not give happiness. General obstacles to happiness are desire, anger, greed, ego, hatred and attachment. When translated into medical practice, causes of unhappiness include getting into rat race, deperonalised approach to a patient, lack of holistic care resulting in patient’s dissatisfaction, increasing stress to the doctor in addition to, poor life style and burnout. It is one’s motivation that decides what one wants to do and the attitude to decide how well to do. Happiness resides in everyone, don’t search outside but be motivated to find it.

Personal notes

Most doctors tend to neglect their own health with an excuse of busy practice. My teacher always said that busy people had enough time because they knew how to manage time. Our joint practice has given me time for my own health. It takes just an hour to work out each day that is just 4% of daily time. Same is true about disciplined eating and sleeping time. It has made my life healthier and more enjoyable. I always took a break for 10 minutes after working for two hours in my clinic that rejuvenated me. Once a patient who had a next appointment started arguing with my attendant and barged in my room. When he saw me having coffee, he got angry and said my child is sick and you are relaxing. I softly told him that I was having coffee to rejuvenate myself so that I could see his child in a better frame of mind and energy and requested him to wait for few more minutes. He obliged and when came in, I told him my break was for his child’s benefit and he apologized.

Tale home message

Every doctor must nurture himself and take care of his own life. Besides maintaining good life style that would ensure physical health, one must give equal importance to nurture mental and spiritual health. However, happiness should be the ultimate aim to boost complete health. Be always grateful for what you have, don’t compare with others but compete with yourself to improve. Work hard with passion and share work with others to maintain quality of work. It will give you peace and leisure that makes life enjoyable and boosts health and happiness. Don’t forget life has an expiry date. If you nurture yourself well, you will die young but as late as possible.

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